The Week That Has Been

With exams and the unholy raised levels of anxiety related to getting a Graduate Year now over, I was given a week off until my final placement. This was a time when I should've been relaxing and content with the fact that there were no assignments, exams or impending doom with figuring out Grad Year results. Fortunately for me I got my first preference - eeyay.

I think it was on Sunday when I got sick.

Maybe I got sick because my body was under the impression it could let its immune defence down during the relaxation process after being under so much stress for so long.

Maybe it was also due to the fact I went out two nights in the same week (a rare thing for me) causing me to become even more run down. It was a lot of fun at the time though...

Or, most likely, I became sick when older sister Courtney dropped by for a visit - bringing a nasty cold along with her...

It could have been a combination of things... anyway, getting sick during my one week off wasn't the most ideal way to enjoy it. It was a nasty cold too - talk about being the mucous queen for a day. Sorry, you probably didn't need to read that.

Moving on. Despite being sick, Mum and I were still able to enjoy some quality time together. We played some scrabble.

We were both very tired at the time.

Not too long after, younger sister Caity came to check up on us.

Due to my sickness I didn't really get out much. Except for a trip to the doctors to get some antibiotics. Not very exciting but at least the consultation didn't take too long. However, whilst waiting for the pharmacist to prepare my amoxicillin I received a call from the doctor I just visited.

If doctors forgetting to ask whether or not you're allergic to anything does not inspire confidence I don't know what does.

Anyway that will be all for today. I'll leave you with an image of me doing one of my favourite past-times (performed throughout most of the week that has been)... sitting in front of my bookcase - looking for a DVD to watch.

This task can take hours...

Stupidly Happy

Hello there.

I have much to be happy about. I've finished my final exams (and I think I did quite well), I have my preceptorship coming up in theatre (can't wait to see some operations!!) and I also got my first preference for my Graduate Year! Exciting times are up ahead.

I also have the opportunity to blog more frequently - extra big "YAY".

To kick-start my blogging I have made a little video using MS Paint and Windows Movie Maker. It's a little rushed but it helps express my happiness. I hope you'll enjoy it.

By the way - the song "Stupidly Happy" is by XTC, I have nothing to do with the song apart from the fact that I like it and it was fun to draw pictures to.

Intermission

It has been a while.

I might as well cease to exist. The internet will continue to go on... and try to convince me that the way I spelt 'internet' is wrong. Which is just depressing. And I refuse to address it with a capital letter just so spell-check says it's correct.

Ohhh to be in a mood. To be in a state where you think your opinion does not matter. Where your voice goes better unheard - or in this case, unread. And it's times like these when I just have to simply wonder...

To tell you the truth, I thought by now I would have at least achieved my dream of becoming an author. Then I would move on to become a graphic novel artist, song-writer or at least had some sort of serialisation created by me taking up some space in the cartoon section of a newspaper. But I don't know what happened. Something impeded my path to becoming successful creatively. Oh yeah...

UNIVERSITY.

I wanted to have a career - and nursing was a profession I wanted to work in anyway. I convinced myself I could pursue both dreams but one dream sort of pushed the other out of the way.

In the process I feared that university was depriving me of my creative skills. And just recently I was beginning to have thoughts that perhaps I should just turn away from my passion for drawing ect. because it was only putting a strain on my studies. And it's not like it's benefiting anyone anyway.

Then I will move on, get my degree and begin to pursue my career in the field of nursing. However I can see myself regretting giving up my passion, for never giving myself the opportunity to extend beyond my limits and establish myself as an artist. Eventually, this regret will consume me - sending me into a dark abyss of... dissatisfaction and deprivation.

So is this really the right thing to do? Should I really give it all up?

Damn straight! I'm not one to give up on things so easily, especially something that I have pursued for so long! So for those of you who want to look at what I have to offer - I thank you! Be prepared for bigger - ever better things! And for those of you who don't wanna look - I suggest you divert your eyes!

Now onto more enlightening topics (I apologise for the short entry as exams are coming up and since these are my last exams... EVER, they do require a bit more of my attention... - can you sense where my depression was originally coming from?).

I have taken up guitar! It's been a few weeks now, but let's just say... I'm pretty good.

I just don't want anyone to listen to me right now until I have mastered my playing. I especially hate it when people appear out of no where whilst I'm jamming away.

I decided to teach myself guitar because it's a really fun and practical skill to have. Plus... I have worked out the chords to a particular song I wrote... and I may be using it for an animated clip I'm preparing.

I don't want to say too much. But I will say this: owl and sound. All will make sense in the future.

In the meantime -

By the way - wanna check out more of the action beyond TAAOC-AO? Well allow me to direct you to some juicy-juicy links... well perhaps they're just juicy - I need to add a little more juice to them to make them that juicy. All in good time my lovely people.

So as you all know, this is the 'Home' blog page. Sorry for the simplicity of these instructions - I believe you to all be highly intellectual beings. And I say that with the deepest sincerity.

"Chapter It" will take you to another link where I post chapters from stories that I am in the process of writing - or just random snippets of things I'm working on. Currently there's not much going on, but if you haven't checked it out already there's a very poorly made animation clip you are more than welcome to check out.

As you may have already noticed I use MS Paint (and sometimes Adobe Photoshop) to do my pictures - and every now and then I will upload a few pictures on this link. These pictures have a little more detail than the ones featured in my blog. Eventually, I will have a page that will have some of my hand-drawn pictures up for everyone to see, ya-ay.

Want to see some more MS Paint pictures? This link will direct you to TAAOC-AO facebook page! Here you'll find a collection of drawings I've done on MS Paint. Plus, it has the link directly to the blog under the "Info" section. I will also be using the page to show updates and changes made it the blog - so if you wanna be 'in-the'know', that's the place to go!

Now this is something special. The REAL MEN facebook page. So, you want to know what it takes to be a REAL MAN? Well look no further! My buddies and I have made a collection of clips, pics and words of wisdom that all contribute to what it means to be MANLY! Complete with extra GRRRR.

As you can see, my popularity is astounding. I am sad to admit that one of the six followers is me. But it doesn't take much to become a follower - and it's nice and encouraging to see a new face or two! So don't hesitate to be a follower. Would you feel more comfortable if I titled the section as "The Awesome Peeps" instead? I'm anxious to hear your thoughts.

And here we have a link to my Manga Fox profile. Yes, I am a huge fan of manga - this profile doesn't really show it with my total of TWO FRIENDS :D Anyway, if you're a fan of manga, Manga Fox is an awesome place where I spend what little free time I have. Just don't be too surprised if you see my profile covered in cobwebs. I'm not as hardcore as some of the manga-lovers out there. That is one society I don't think I'll ever fit in with. Oh well.

Last but not least, the 'Like' button! You like this blog? You push 'Like' button! Now, because I'm incompetent with the internet I am yet to figure out how to link the button with my facebook page. But to show your likeness-ness, it doesn't hurt to push two buttons... does it? Grrowwwl. Sorry, that was inappropriate.

So feel free to have a squizz around the blog and pages! Hope everyone is enjoying the weather*!

*Didn't know how to finish the blog.

And It Hurts With Every Heartbeat

Sigh...

Ever since I was 14 I've had a problem with my heart. It was nothing serious – otherwise I’d probably be more than dead right now seeing as I had done little about it up until recently. Having said that it was an inconvenience all the same.

I had a condition called SVT. Otherwise known as supra ventricular tachycardia.

Say it with me now,

Su-pra ven-tric-u-lar tach-y-car-di-a. :)

It’s a disorder when there is an irregular electrical pathway in the heart. Triggered by an unknown cause, this pathway can result in the heart beating very fast (a fast heart rate is known as tachycardia for all you non-medical people).

So the very first time I experienced one of these episodes was when I was 14, like I said earlier. I was at school, it was recess and I was hanging out with my friends when all of a sudden...

I became very light-headed, my limbs felt heavy and I was cold. There was an extremely uncomfortable sensation in my chest and throat. I can describe the feeling as though someone was repeatedly punching me from the inside of my chest cavity, whilst someone else was strangling me.

My condition didn’t improve after time and I went home soon afterwards.

Since then the episodes would occur very intermittently and rarely. For the first few years they’d happen once or twice per annum. The length of time they’d last for also varied – from a few seconds to many hours.

Over the past few years my concern for these episodes increased as they happened more frequently. I asked my mum what she thought about it. I got the strangest reply.

I didn’t really think that she was correct. There was no way my heart felt healthy when I was having an episode...

It wouldn’t have really bothered me to have these episodes. Like I said they were more of an inconvenience when they were occurring. I can describe what happens to me when I’m having an episode with pictures.

Mum then thought that it was lifestyle related – like I didn’t exercise enough or something... pfft. I didn’t think it was. My lifestyle is quite healthy I always thought. And the episodes weren’t triggered by anything either. It wasn’t caused by stress or exertion. I could be having a shower, hanging up the washing or even just sitting down and it would happen. And I mean it when I say violent – you could see my whole chest vibrating because of it.

It took until the time I was barely 19 for me to go and get it checked out. I went to my GP who referred me to get a blood test and an electrocardiograph (ECG). I never had an ECG before. So I was quite surprised when I got there...

Anyway, the results all turned up normal. I wasn’t surprised, neither was my GP. Her advice was to go to emergency the next time I had an episode so they can assess me as it’s happening, therefore hopefully being able to make a diagnosis.

So, one day...

There wasn’t anyone available at home to take me to emergency, so I ended up driving myself there... looking back now, it probably wasn’t one of my best ideas.

(My car doesn't look so manly by the way...)

But I needed to hurry and get there – I didn’t know if it was going to be one of those really short or really long episodes.

And when I got there I took a bit of extra time to find all-day parking. Even in a critical state I refuse to pay for parking...

I could never really do much when experiencing an episode. My only option was to rest. So driving myself to emergency and walking a fair distance isn’t necessarily prescribed.

I made it to emergency a little worse for wear.

I went inside the hospital and walked up to the triage nurse.

1 minute later.

So my heart rate is normally 60 beats a minute. The average persons heart rate is between 60 and 80 bpm. When I was admitted to ED it was 200 bpm. I was hooked up to a vital signs machine, had to give a urine specimen, had many ECGs, chest x-rays, got put on 6L of oxygen, had an intravenous (IV) needle put in, was given some drugs and got asked heaps of questions.

The emergency doctor came up with the diagnosis of atrial flutter and I was given a referral to go see a cardiologist and have an echocardiogram (an ultrasound of the heart).

I also got advised not to drive myself to emergency if I was having an episode...

The echocardiogram was alright, except when the probe tried to restrict the passage of airflow in my neck. The cardiac technician did say however that I had the best trachea he’d ever seen *smug*.

When I had my appointment with the cardiologist some months later he told me the diagnosis was SVT.

By then I was so glad to get diagnosed and to know that it was nothing life threatening. However, if left untreated it can cause some problems in the future. For example, I wouldn’t be able to handle the episodes as well, or there’s a small possibility of a stroke – but I didn’t want to think about that (O_O)

So I was given one of three options. One: do nothing. Two: go on medication. Three: have surgery.

I was given some time to think about it. There was a chance that it would go away on its own, but I can’t risk having an episode whilst working. Nursing isn’t the kind of job where you can simply sit and rest for twenty minutes whilst your heart has an electrical fit. So doing nothing wasn’t an option. Straight and simple I didn’t want to go on medication either. No thank you.

At the start of this year I met up with another cardiologist to go on the waiting list for the procedure. It is called an electrophysiologic study and catheter ablation.

Basically, the surgeon makes a small incision under the clavicle and another near the groin. Then they’ll insert a few tubes in the incisions, and then insert some wires through the tubes into the vessels. The wires will then go all the way into my heart. Then I will receive a series of electrical shocks to try and trigger the SVT. Then the pathway can be identified and burned.

Oh and did I mention I have to be awake during the procedure?

After approximately 6 ½ months of waiting I finally got a call to book me in for the procedure. At this time I was just about to go in for an interview at a hospital for a graduate position.

Understandably I was no longer so nervous about the interview.

I was booked for the following Friday.

Then that got cancelled one day beforehand and postponed till next Friday.

Then the day finally came.

The surgeon explained the procedure to me. I’ve heard it all many times before. He also outlined the risks which I’m also well aware of. The complications of the procedure may be that I might need a pace maker if things go wrong. There was also a chance of having a heart attack or stroke. Big risks, but a very small chance of them occurring.

I won’t go too much into detail about experiencing the procedure – something about the sensation of feeling the wires move around inside you and being able to feel parts of your heart being burned with a probe may make some people feel uneasy. A local in the groin wasn’t that fun either.

However I did enjoy the midazolam and fentanyl.

But it wore off pretty quickly, so I needed a few more doses (as the procedure went for 2 1/2 hrs).

The operation was successful I’m happy to say. I was discharged that day too. I just had to be kept under observation for a while and had to keep my leg straight – and as a tall person who likes to sit in awkward-looking but surprisingly comfortable positions that was quite difficult.

I am now 5 days post op. Over the weekend I was extremely weak and became exhausted after minimal exertion. For example, mum and I went down the street the other day.

I also kept getting heart burn – and it’s not gastro oesophageal reflux disease (GORD) either. Well, I have to think of it as an actual burn wound in my heart. Eeeeew. But it’s getting better, and I’m finding it easier to move around again. I’m also pretty lucky because there is very minimal scarring from the incisions.

And best of all, if this procedure falls into the comfy 95% range – my SVT will be fixed!

Whilst my procedure was pretty straight forward it was still an operation on the heart. And I don’t think I’d ever want to go through that again. Seeing as there’s a small possibility that I might need another procedure is disturbing enough.

So people, don’t take your health for granted. You never know what will happen to you. I recommend being the healthiest you can be so you’ll be prepared if you ever need an operation. Smoking, drinking and a dodgy diet will each contribute to bigger risks and longer recoveries - as well as further complications with your health.

Also...

I NEVER SMOKE AND RARELY DRINK AND I HAD TO GO THROUGH ALL THAT SO TO THOSE WHO THINK THEY CAN STAY 'HEALTHY' AND STILL MAKE BAD LIFESTYLE CHOICES –

-TO YOU!!!!

PS. Thanks for reading this very long post. It's hard to believe there's still a lot of stuff I had to cut out... But oh well. It's all in the past now!
By the way - didn't I look so CU-UTE in my St Mary's uniform? XD